I don't see the bloody point

I'm more than an hour late
I have no excuses
It takes me one and a half hours to get here
Today it took two
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
How far is JC rd from Residency rd?
It doesn't matter
I walked it
'You're not going to faint the minute you get there'
'Chill'
'You're going to be alright'
'You know who you are. You can do it'
And I did
I started looking for a career yesterday.
I went to the placement cell today
I will do it one step at a time
All my new year resolutions will have a tick and a smiley on them
I can
I will
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Lyrical Coda

All good things start in boring classes! Lyrical coda is a byproduct of yawns, vague memories and a combination of words from, if I may say so, RANDOM songs. See, this is how it goes…

1. Pick a lyric out of the top of your head

2. Write it down on a blank piece of paper.

3. Challenge a friend, who is invariably sitting next to you in this boring, boring class to continue the strain of thought with another lyric of a song.

And this amalgamation of bits and pieces of songs you love will eventually become a contortion of music which may or may not make sense!

Our first attempt at this style of music composition (ahem!) led to a kind of angst-y, let-go love letter written to this imaginary character called Cecelia. Read and enjoy!

PS: Lyrical Coda saw the beginning of SPAS! Cheers to Quickies!

Send a heartbeat to Cecilia!

You’re breaking my head, it rolls in a park, on a boulevard of broken dreams. Sometime you can’t make it on your own, but life goes on and lights will guide you on the loneliest day of your life.

I am your hate when you want love. Hate is a strong word but I hate everything about you. Why does your friend make you run? Now, you are gone forever. It ends tonight, if you gave it all away, but it’s not too late to make a memory.

I miss you baby and I don’t want the world to see me cos everyone’s pointing their fingers, always infecting young minds faster than bacteria.

I wonder if you could be happy if you try, try so hard, someday, somewhere, somebody to love…love is all around and what comes around goes around! So don’t worry, everything will be alright. I dare you to move along, move along even when your hope dangles on a string.

You belong to me and I love to see you cry over and over again. I’m broken, again with or without you.

Those three words are not a miracle drug, so here I am, with arms wide open. I’m sorry I’m bad, I’m sorry I’m rude. But it’s too late to apologise for everything I just couldn’t do. I wish I was like a bird cos it’s time to go, have no fear.

Welcome to wherever you are cos you’re stuck in a moment. It’s just one of those days when tears cry on their own.

So this is the last song I sing for the moment…Sing. Sing, Sing. I’m not going to write you a love song. There are many things I would like to say to you, but I am unwritten. Strange, Strange, Strange.

Sigh...

Sigh after sigh
High and dry
Happiness is not as momentary as they say it is
The desire for happiness lingers

Human desires buried in the grave....
But aren't human desires the very essence of human existence?

I need to need someone again
I know it sounds desperate
I know it's a vain pursuit
I just want to know that feeling again

I want to feel that fear again
That fear of letting someone know me too well
That fear of being too close to ever let go

Maybe I just need something to occupy my mind
A new passion
Not necessarily a person
But nothing fills the room like human presence

I shrink...I shrink into myself
Too consumed in the person I've been, the person I am, the person I'm becoming and the person I need to be ...
Too consumed in myself to need anyone else

Yes, it is just the mind and not the heart that yearns for newness
Give me something new to think about
I am inured to feelings anyway
Just keep my mind working
And my cold heart will follow its lead

13th August 2008 12:20 am
I suddenly know exactly what I want and this feels wierd
After following the random scrolling OCD rule for so long this is out of character for me
I know
All of a sudden, I know!

"Follow me down to the valley below

You know

Moonlight is bleeding from out of your soul"

Lazurus
Porcupine Tree
I know!

12th August 2008, 11.56pm
Script is here!
I can see each shot playing out in my head. I need to be there to make sure MY picture and THE picture matches.

I don't want to read it anymore.
The idea of holding a hard copy in my hand tomo is like meeting a person in the flesh.
The script is a person to me. I like that.
The soft copy on my computer loses its appeal all of a sudden
The night I put aside to pouring over each green and red line on Word will now be spent listening to Karma Police in repeat.

Bright Blue Socks

Ankle length, cotton, bright, blue socks, rolled into balls next to the pink ones. A choice had to be made. Where are loners when you need them?
Two baby squirrels abandoned in their nest needed socks to sleep in. The pink ones were old- worn elastic, grubby heels. They were worn in Bombay, the last time...The blue ones were grabbed, lined with cotton wool and warmed on the rug by the fire.
They looked like rats. Eyes still closed, three white stripes on each back. Each one was lifted out of the smelly nest and placed in their cocoon homes. Lots of wriggling later, squirrel snores.

11th August 2008, 11.56pm
Script is comings comings..I cant wait!
Inertia Creeps
We had our first fight today
Sometimes I think we're more than just friends
Sisters...no! Somewhere in between...

I dono where to start..
It's been a long time since i wrote one of these late night posts from my own home!
It's August...yeah so?
I've spent it looking at old diaries and reveling in who I used to be, being surprised that I wasn't as naive as I thought I was.
hmmm...I like Sundays
I need new headphones
I wasted so much food this weekend
It's a miracle that house doesn't have a rat
Oh thats what I wanted to talk about
So I spent the weekend at Akshay's place
It was fun
We got a lot of work done

• Script for movie ready!
• I can't wait for Coonoor!
• Listened to 1979 from Debs mp3 thing
• Akshay had promised me we'd listen to that on the way there..someday
• And that someday could very well be the 27th of August!!

And a lot of fun too :)

• Whiskey
• Three double shots
• We drank to 'Homecoming', to Milo, to me being there and to Felix and Deepa ;)
  
• I sang Razor and it actually sounded good..I like my drunk voice
• When I put my head down on the pillow it felt like a planet..rotating and revolving..orbiting the sun while going around its own axis at uneven speed..wow
• I slept on Shake's shoulder

I'm unbelievably comfortable with them
Even changed in the dark in the same room!
He he..I guess they really are brothers in every sense of the word
We sat up gossiping (pah! boys!)
They wanted me to dish
I did
yeah
he he...just enough to keep them from thinking I'm absolutely boring!
Last song...Karma Police..deb's rendition
Then the snoring..man! it was loud!
I moved around a lot
At one point I was squished between shakes knees and akshay's tummy!
A lot of maneuvering to be done there
Finally Snorer No1 decided to use the loo and I invaded his space, abscond with the pillow
He had to sleep diagonally the rest of the morning!

Yeah..I've left out a lot..like the real reason I had to change
The Room mates
Brian Sa
Ivan...'That's one pretty fella', I remember saying
Justin..new fella..they did the oxygen rush thing on him...
The weed
The pork
Batman Begins..I only remember being awake thru the credits
Oh and the return of 'That thing only'
Grin...I love these Rls

The morning never really started
Lots of naps..one pancake style one that I particularly enjoyed
Comics
Attempted Grand Theft Auto..I suck!
New scene in movie...shots in seconds
We were pros by the end of it
But I know the movie is gonna be very different from what we are picturing right now
Ah well..It's gonna win an Oscar someday
And as Suppu once said we'll go get best screenplay award ok?
Grin..nothing wrong with dreaming
That reminds me I have to make Raakhis!
The smiley idea dint really work..have to figure out smt..
So much to do this week!
Sigh...slowly dear slow and steady is the way to go
He he...degrees of freedom..