I just realised why I'm working at IBM.
I'm good at it.
For the first time after a long time, I'm top of the class.
I'm the best there is.
I like that feeling.
I haven't felt that sense of accomplishment since school.
It gives me something to rejoice in.
It gives me something to be proud of.
My self worth sours every time I get an appreciation, every time Rajat Sir or Arsh congratulates me. I like being this good at something.
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I hate remembering the not-so-good times. More often than not, my thoughts linger on the unpleasant experiences and I wish this didn't happen so often. I really need to start letting go, forgiving myself for my imperfections.
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And in that time between the last touch of make up and getting on the cab, she prays. She thanks, she forgives, she hopes...
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